What if... today was your last day?

What if you woke up this morning knowing TODAY WAS YOUR LAST DAY?  Would it alter the way you behaved or reacted? 

Would you be a more kind, grateful, or patient? Give longer hugs? Smile at a stranger? Call your parents? Forgive someone? Have a wild sexy adventure with your partner? Go home from work on time? Sit down at the table for dinner with your family and talk? Would you pray? Go for a run? Climb a mountain?

I would like to think...if we just had one day... we would stop and do ABSOLUTELY everything we could in those last moments to REALLY make an IMPACT with our families, our friends, our loved ones...to let them know we loved them. 

After that we might get a little adventurous and jump out of a plane or something...but you get the picture.

Here's the big idea...it's YOUR LIFE...you get to say how it goes!! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR??!!You have the power to create a life that matters...RIGHT NOW...whether that's a stay-at-home mom or a CEO of a multi billion dollar corporation...WHO YOU ARE...MATTERS!!

B THE LIGHT!! Catch on fire!!

Let me really drive this point home because it's January 3rd and I promised my readers 2012 was going to look radically different for them!! So... I have read and reread The Leader Who Had No Title by Robin Sharma...so this totally comes from that Guru...but

IMAGINE...you are literally in the grave yard...its just about sunrise...you are digging your own grave....and you stumble upon this massive stone tablet.  You struggle, dig it up, and dust it off to read THE 10 HUMAN REGRETS....so you begin to read aloud...

THE 10 HUMAN REGRETS:

1.      You reach your last day with the brilliant song that your life was meant to sing still silent within you.

2.      You reach your last day without ever having experienced the natural power that inhabits you to do great work and achieve great things.

3.      You reach your last day realizing that you never inspired anyone else by the example that you set.

4.      You reach your last day full of pain at the realization that you never took any bold risks and so you never received any bright rewards.

5.      You reach your last day understanding that you missed the opportunity to catch a glimpse of mastery because you bought into the lie that you had to resign to mediocrity.

6.      You reach your last day and feel heartbroken that you never learned the skill of transforming adversity into victory and lead into gold.

7.      You reach your last day regretting that you forgot that work is about being radically helpful to others rather than being helpful to only yourself.

8.      You reach your last day with the awareness that you ended up living the life that society trained you to want versus leading the life you truly wanted to have.

9.      You reach your last day and awaken to the fact you never realized your absolute best nor touched the special genius that you were build to become.

10.  You reached your last day and discover you could have been a leader and left this world so much  better than you found it.  But you refused to accept that mission because you were just too scared.  And so you failed.  And wasted a life.

So you look up and say..NO!! Now what, you ask?  KEEP DIGGING!! You pick up that heavy shovel.  The sun is starting to peak out from the clouds and you hear a loud "clink."  You look down to discover yet another massive tablet...but this one is different...it was shinning a bit...so you dig faster til you can pull out this golden tablet.  Engraved on the top read THE 10 HUMAN VICTORIES...so you begin to read aloud again...

THE 10 HUMAN VICTORIES:

1.      You reach your end full of happiness and fulfillment on realizing that you are all used up-having spent the fullness of your talents, the biggest of your resources, and the best of your potential doing great work and leading a rare-air life.

2.      You reach your end knowing that you played at a standard of concentrated excellence and held yourself to the most impeccable of standards in each thing that you did.

3.      You reach your end in noisy celebration for having the boldness of spirit to have regularly confronted your largest fears and realized your highest visions

4.      You reach your end and recognize that you became the person who built people up versus one who tore people down.

5.      You reach your end with the understanding that while your journey may have not always been a smooth one, whenever you got knocked down you instantly got back up – and at all times, never suffered from any loss of optimism.

6.      You reach your end and bask in the staggering glory of your phenomenal achievements along with the rich value you have contributed to the lives of the people you were lucky to serve.

7.      You reach your end and adore the strong, ethical, inspirational, and empathetic person you grew into.

8.      You reached your end and realized that you were a genuine innovator who blazed new trails instead of following old roads.

9.      You reach your end surrounded with teammates who call you a rock star, customers who say you’re a hero, and loved ones who call you a legend.

10.  You reach your end as a true Leader Without a Title, knowing that the great deeds you will endure long after your death and that your life stands as a model of possibility.

Powerful, YES?  You have many more days ahead...Which tablet or tombstone do you want to be holding?  Be mindful, be courageous & B the Light!

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How are the holidays going to BE for you this year?

The answer to that, for many is....well just like last year, I guess...fine, ok, maybe disappointing, upsetting, stressful...sound familiar?  I get that. 

Here is an idea to try on....your holiday can GO how you SAY its going TO GO??!! Crazy right??!!

So you have 2 choices this holiday season.  You can either sit in the stands of your life and watch your holiday come and go OR you can get on the court and play your game (life) full out!! Get it??!!

So I ask you again....How are the holidays going to BE?  What do you want to create?

Let's breakdown what it really means to be "upset."  What are the 3 things that have to be present for someone to get upset?  (learned this in Landmark Education Seminar...AMAZING)

1. A thwarted intention...what does that mean??!? Hey...It's not going my way!!!
2. An unfulfilled expectation.  This is when we see how something SHOULD go and it just doesn’t go that way.
3. Undelivered communication...what's that? We withhold something that needs to be said, or someone withholds from us

What's the result??!!  WE GET UPSET!!!

How do we dismantle UPSET??!!

1. Recognize... hey I'm upset
2. Determine the source of the upset (1,2,or 3 above)
3. Be responsible for the upset...like OH I didn't tell you how I wanted it to go
4. Communicate

So how does this play out in the holiday, right?

Let's take Thanksgiving for me this year as an example.  So every year it was this big ordeal right?!? We would get up, really dreading the day, head out like 10am, drove like an hour out to my mom's where she cooked the huge delicious elaborate meal, get there, stuff our faces, watch the clock, clean up, watch the clock, visit a little bit, watch the clock head out like 3pm...drive another hour to my husbands family feel stuffed and miserable as we sat down to his mother's huge delicious elaborate meal, stuff our faces, watch the clock, clean up, watch the clock, visit a bit, watch the clock, head out like 8pm, go home, crash and be miserably stuffed.

And every year I would GET UPSET see above :) because it really didn't GO the way I intended it to go. Like that's not really what I wanted out of my holiday??!!! (Can you see me stomping my foot??!!)  Where was the joy and fun in THAT? And I would spend the next couple of days upset and regretful. Sound familiar? 

Here's the reality...our families really never knew this upset us...we never told them!!  WOW!! We were just sitting on the stands of our life watching the holiday go by...and we got what we got... that was an unfulfilled holiday and a big belly ache!!

Can you begin to get this?  Does this resonate with anyone out there?

So this year, my husband and I sat down and created what we wanted.  How does that happen?  Well...you just talk about it, throw out ideas.  We were like...what's important? If we could have it all...what would it look like?  

Well....we discovered what was important was that we got to be with family, relax, play games together, have great food, like have the ability to just sit and talk with each other.  We live in the same town but how often do we really just sit, interact and enjoy each other??!! Right??!! 

So I sent out an email to our families, enrolling them in what was important to us...which was to be with them longer & on more easeful terms.  Who wouldn't want that???!!! Hey I love you and want more of you!!

We proposed combining families to our house and dividing up the menu.  Everyone was like yeah! Bring it on!!  And if it doesn't work...we can create something new next time, right??!!

So what happened??!! Each of the mothers were delighted to share in the cooking.  We got the best of the best combined cooked meal... it was succulent.  We got to spend all day together, kids hanging out, taking pictures, playing games, eating 1 fabulous meal.  We got joy & laughter.  We just got to BE.  It was EXTRAORDINARY!!

"UPSET" was avoided by everyone because we created, communicated & delivered on our intentions.

So can you see how your holiday with your family could be COMPLETELY transformed?  YOU have the power to dismantle UPSET...power is in language and communication...

So I ask you again...How are the holidays going to BE for you this year?  Create NOW and COMMUNICATE to your family, friends & loved ones.  Make this holiday EXTRAORDINARY!!

With love & affection you CAN have it all!!

Be courageous!  B the light (Santa is watching)

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